Terminal Server Question

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[MrX]

Hi Chal,

Need help again.

I know your the technical IT guru of the Clan so I thought I'd ask you first.

Well I have of course Windows Server 2003 Terminal Server and I am having a printing issue.

The god damn client connecting to this server just won't print.

Anyhow the client is connecting through a Sonic Wall vpn appliance running over a ADSL2 link.

The clients printer will print locally but when they try to print from terminal server it says The document Failed to print because you don't worship Bill Gates enough. Anyway when i sit their praying (swearing my hole out)a while and hit the computer a couple of times bang amazingly it prints. What i'm asking is how the hell can i get this client printer to print straight away without having to blasphemy and hurt my knuckles every time and how i can pretend to worhship Bill when really i worhship open source.

Guru please Help.

X

[Virgil83]

Oh you need to install KB1882787 - The Microsoft Omnipotence Printer Patch for Windows 2003 Based Terminal Services. 

This patch sets the registry on the Terminal Server to automatically acknowledge your inferiority to Bill Gates, that he is the lord almighty and performs virtual kicking services via the Microsoft Kickboxing Extensions Service.  Please be advised that Microsoft .NET 1.1 must be installed for this service to function correctly.

The registry key in question is HKEY_LOCAL_USER\Software\Microsoft\Windows\Terminal Services\ and the key it modifies is BILLGATESISGOD=1.

Hope that helps.

[Damit]

 :PDT_Armataz_01_23: real advice

 :Crazy: i feel dirty now

[Virgil83]

That wasn't real advice... sheesh... lucky you work with Macs Damit...

[Noraa78]

That wasn't real advice... sheesh... lucky you work with Macs Damit...

+1


Mr X,.. you don't happen to work for Kiandra do you?

[Chalice]

Well MrX...I'm glad you asked.

The problem you see isnt to do with printing or communication at all and i for one am ashamed of you and your work mates in using a server that is terminal..that server has no doubt given you years of quality service and now thats its terminally ill you wont give it a rest during its final days.

My friend I know that you have become attached to it...but you need to begin the process of letting go and retire the poor thing.

The solution is to be there for the server in its darkest days, maybe hold it a party or two and just generally be a support network for it...dont patronize it...just support it.

If you guys are that attached to it..maybe look at alternative medicine and search for a miracle cure OR you can turn to Satanism and lay it out in the centre of a pentagram and sacrifice a young virgin *looks at Dex* to the devil in return for a cure...but beware he is a shifty bastard and the result may not be what you expect...so be prepared to grow a second penis on your chest or something of that nature.

If all else fails and the terminal server passes...know that you'll always remember it and move on and find a replacement server.

We here at DeathInc are very sorry to hear that your server is Terminal and hope that it doesn't suffer too much in the coming days.

Yours Sincerely,

Chalice

P.s. You can always try and put it out of its misery if it becomes unbearable by hitting it with a sledgehammer 9-10 times..but as this is currently illegal in our country..I didn't say it ok?

[MrX]

That wasn't real advice... sheesh... lucky you work with Macs Damit...

+1


Mr X,.. you don't happen to work for Kiandra do you?

Lol Noraa78 and Damit especially damit for thinking it was real advice.

As for Chal I think I will take up your advice on the virgin part. But I don't know any. Maybe Dex can help me out with that.

And Noraa78 no I don't work for Kiandra. Any company that is in the BRW are just pulling them self. I work for a much bigger and better company-- Cough cough-- The Government--.

p.s. It was an actual problem except for bill gates shit, and i've fixed it. But I just love Chals response's. Big LOL and +1 to Chal

[Noraa78]

i was only asking becuase i had a guy at kiandra pulling his hair out for a couple of days becuase i couldn't print.

[MrX]

LOL what printer. Terminal servers have a heart attack with certain printers. In my case I had to create a inf and cat file from scratch to get it working only just.

[Noraa78]

ricoh mp c2500

apparently the driver decided to pack up and go on a holiday. Only affected me coz i log into the work network through citrix, and not the workstations in the office.

[Cam]

Yeah its been a bit of a bastard eh X?
You've been on the phone most of this week to the bloke trying to sort it out. Its hard dealing with things outside of the domain where we don't have control.

--

I think the best solution is to do what this redneck did
 :toung3:

#Invalid YouTube Link#

[Ametros]

If you guys are that attached to it..maybe look at alternative medicine and search for a miracle cure OR you can turn to Satanism and lay it out in the centre of a pentagram and sacrifice a young virgin *looks at Dex* to the devil in return for a cure...but beware he is a shifty bastard and the result may not be what you expect...so be prepared to grow a second penis on your chest or something of that nature.

You are absolutely brilliant Chal, especially the "*looks at Dex*".
+1 now. And likely a few others if I remember any other day..

[KARNAGE]

how was damit to know it wasnt real advice, mac users dont need that complicated crap (most of the time i think anyway), i woulda thought it was real aswell. that redneck probably has the right idea anyway