How to correct people that write and say my name wrong.

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[CordlezToaster]

Dear Chalice

Ive had this super fucking annoying problem of late, people addressing me in emails with the wrong fucking name.

Thats right!. They often call me "Trevor", "Tod", "Tory", "Trent" and even "Tony", this fucking annoys me the most "Toe Knee" like what kind of name is that?.

How do i fix this?.

[BoHiCa]

If I may pick an easier name like fuckface

[Virgil83]

Yeah I'd have to agree with that... perhaps even go a league more simple... start signing off your emails "Hey you!" or "That guy" or something...

[Syklone]

roll around in milo and coffee for an hour, then you will be that 'token black guy' or the "N" word

[Z00111111]

Is it safe to assume your real name is Simon?

[CordlezToaster]

No, my name is not Simon.
Let me add that to the list as well.

[Z00111111]

Do we have to guess your name first? Then Chalice can step in and tell you to get that name tattooed across your face so people don't forget it?

[BoHiCa]

Do we have to guess your name first? Then Chalice can step in and tell you to get that name tattooed across your face so people don't forget it?

Zoo,

Cord's realname has no relevance to being tattooed on his face as he does not see the people that email him, unless he was to add that selfie to his signature!!!

[Z00111111]

Well that would have been the next step. Refusal to talk to people over the phone. All contact would be face-to-face or via Skype video calls.

[Chalice]

Well Cordlez...i'm glad you asked!!

I think there is only one possible solution, I (of course) applied my considerable mind to this problem and after hours of ball scratching and the occasional window lick came up with the answer!

First, the problem is that these dumb motherfuckers all had one of these as a child and as such it has just plain fucked their language skill set up!




NOTE: E.T. the extra Testicle had the same fuking problem "EL-IDI-OT"



Solution:

Simply enter everything into a speak n spell and hold conversations that way with these retards!

Alternatively... begin to refer to yourself as "Mr T"!



CAUTION: Only refer to yourself as Mr T if you are cool enough to pull it off...or are hung like a donkey.



Hope that helps!


CHA-LI-CE

[CordlezToaster]

Well Cordlez...i'm glad you asked!!

I think there is only one possible solution, I (of course) applied my considerable mind to this problem and after hours of ball scratching and the occasional window lick came up with the answer!

First, the problem is that these dumb motherfuckers all had one of these as a child and as such it has just plain fucked their language skill set up!




NOTE: E.T. the extra Testicle had the same fuking problem "EL-IDI-OT"



Solution:

Simply enter everything into a speak n spell and hold conversations that way with these retards!

Alternatively... begin to refer to yourself as "Mr T"!



CAUTION: Only refer to yourself as Mr T if you are cool enough to pull it off...or are hung like a donkey.



Hope that helps!


CHA-LI-CE

What you talkin bout fool, your on the jazz.