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Author Topic: This Weeks SMS Funny  (Read 1494 times)
BoHiCa
Clan Vice-Captain

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Karma: 307
Posts: 1486


This is my cup of care \_/ oh look its empty!


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« on: 05/11/2010, 12:53 PM »

A little boy goes 2 his father and asks daddy, how was l born ? The father says ,well son , l guess 1 day u will need 2 find out , yr mum and l first got 2gether in a chat room on yahoo, then l set up a date via e mail with yr mum and we met at a cyber_cafe. We sneakd in2 a secluded room and we googled each other. There yr mother agreed 2 a download from my hard drive. As soon as l was ready 2 upload, we discoverd that neither of us had used a firewall. And since it was 2 late 2 hit the delete button, 9 mths later a little pop up appeard that said = you got male
« Last Edit: 20/01/2011, 11:59 AM by BoHiCa » Logged


I get enough exercise just pushing my luck!
Chalice
Clan Mascot

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Karma: 584
Posts: 7404



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« Reply #1 on: 05/11/2010, 12:56 PM »

Forgot to mention they also got a virus from downloading each other, that sadly resulted in the mother having the blue screen of death
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Does this rag smell like Chloroform to you?
BoHiCa
Clan Vice-Captain

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Karma: 307
Posts: 1486


This is my cup of care \_/ oh look its empty!


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« Reply #2 on: 20/01/2011, 12:00 PM »

Everyone seems to be wondering why Muslim terrorists are so quick to commit suicide. Lets have a look at the evidence:

- No Christmas
- No television
- No nude women
- No football
- No pork chops
- No hotdogs
- No burgers
- No beer
- No bacon
- Rags for clothes
- Towels for hats
- Constant wailing from some cunt in a tower
- More than one wife
- More than one mother in law
- You can't shave
- Your wife can't shave
- You can't wash off the smell of donkey
- You wipe your arse with your hand
- You cook over burning camel shit
- Your wife is picked by someone else
- Your wife smells worse than your donkey

Then they tell you that "when you die, it all gets better"

No shit Sherlock!....
....It's not like it could get much fucking worse!
Logged


I get enough exercise just pushing my luck!
Damit
Getting In there and getting Messy
Clan Captain

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Karma: 344
Posts: 6550


Why Are You Reading This!!!


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« Reply #3 on: 20/01/2011, 08:42 PM »

LMFAO  PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14 PDT_Armataz_01_14
Logged


“You have got to help me. She is trying to kill me with sex. I cannot get out - and I cannot go on!”
BoHiCa
Clan Vice-Captain

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Karma: 307
Posts: 1486


This is my cup of care \_/ oh look its empty!


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« Reply #4 on: 21/01/2011, 10:04 AM »

A young blokes grandad says to him "its going to take a long time to rebuild after all these floods" to which his grandson replied "tell me something i dont know" so his grandad replied "your grandmas ass can take my whole fist.!"
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I get enough exercise just pushing my luck!
cryptochild4
Member



Karma: 52
Posts: 813


I am a very large potato


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« Reply #5 on: 21/01/2011, 01:40 PM »

10 things men know about women,

1. They have a vaginal opening.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10. And tits.
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Ice
Senior Member



Karma: 46
Posts: 803


Like urkle


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« Reply #6 on: 21/01/2011, 04:50 PM »

10 things men know about women,

1. They have a vaginal opening.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10. And tits.

ASSSSS HOLE?
Mouth
Logged

Damit
Getting In there and getting Messy
Clan Captain

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Karma: 344
Posts: 6550


Why Are You Reading This!!!


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« Reply #7 on: 21/01/2011, 07:39 PM »

10 things men know about women,

1. They have a vaginal opening.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10. And tits.

ASSSSS HOLE?
Mouth
would be much better without a mouth
Logged


“You have got to help me. She is trying to kill me with sex. I cannot get out - and I cannot go on!”
-NeOpHyTe-
Member



Karma: 13
Posts: 289


Brown bear is wrong!!


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« Reply #8 on: 26/01/2011, 07:08 PM »

10 things men know about women,

1. They have a vaginal opening.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10. And tits.

ASSSSS HOLE?
Mouth
would be much better without a mouth
simple remove the teeth then you have a Gummy shark
Logged

Chalice
Clan Mascot

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Karma: 584
Posts: 7404



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« Reply #9 on: 26/01/2011, 08:26 PM »

cut out their fucking tongues...done PDT_Armataz_01_34

p.s. Sorry women..love you..love you lots..I MEAN I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOVVVVVE YOU, I mean the shit I'd do to you..and the foot..with the turtle..and the lube WOW..just WOW
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Does this rag smell like Chloroform to you?
-NeOpHyTe-
Member



Karma: 13
Posts: 289


Brown bear is wrong!!


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« Reply #10 on: 25/02/2011, 01:46 PM »

As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces "If im going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman" She removes all of her clothing and asks "is their someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?"

A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here iron this!" PDT_Armataz_01_13
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BoHiCa
Clan Vice-Captain

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Karma: 307
Posts: 1486


This is my cup of care \_/ oh look its empty!


WWW Awards Awards Awards
« Reply #11 on: 17/05/2011, 08:34 AM »


Paddy says, 'Me feet are freezing mate, could you nip upstairs and get me slippers?'

'No bother,' he says, and he runs upstairs and there are Paddy's two stunning 19 year old twin daughters sat on their beds.

'Hello dear girls, your Da' sent me up here to shag ya both.'

'Fook off you liar!'.

'I'll prove it,' Murphy says.

So he shouts down the stairs, 'Both of them, Paddy?'

'Of course, what's the use of fookin' one?'
Logged


I get enough exercise just pushing my luck!
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