Death Inc

 Military  retirement bonus.


If this doesn't make you  laugh, you are truly humor impaired!

The American Navy found they  had too many officers and decided to offer
an early retirement bonus.

They promised any officer who volunteered for retirement a bonus of
$1,000 for every inch measured in a straight line  between any two
points in his body. The officer got to choose what those two points
would be.

The first officer who accepted asked that he be measured from the top of
his head to the tip of his toes.
He was measured at six feet and walked out with a bonus of $72,000.

The second officer who accepted was a little smarter and asked to be
measured from the tip of his outstretched hands to his toes. He walked
out with $96,000.

The third one was a non-commissioned officer, a grizzly old Chief who,
when asked where he would like to be measured replied, "From the tip of
my willy to my testicles."

It was suggested by the pension man that he might want to reconsider,
explaining about the nice big checks the previous two Officers had
received. But the old Chief insisted and they decided to go along with
him providing the measurement was taken by a medical officer.

The medical officer arrived and  instructed the Chief to "drop 'em",
which he did. The medical officer placed the tape measure on the tip of
the Chief's willy and began to work back. "Dear Lord!" he suddenly
exclaimed, "Where are your testicles?"

The old Chief calmly replied, "Vietnam."

LOL

LOL mega time

ROFLMAO best joke ever
 :PDT_Armataz_01_37:

roflmao

lolol